Seven ways to breaking free from the chains of low self esteem and living the life God created you to live.

                                Modified Excerpt from False Labels Vol.1 Story 5

# 6 of 7

Limited by the system?

Do you ever feel like you are limited by the varied believes of this world? Do you ever feel like you are not worthy? Do people look at you as though you were an outcast? Maybe you have dreams and desires, but you don’t feel like you have what it takes or the connections? Or maybe you don’t have the right education. It’s tempting to think, “I’ll never rise any higher. Or I’ll never amount to anything. I’m limited to the system that I’m in.” But you have to remember, God likes to go outside the system! He likes to do unusual, extraordinary things. You may have a dream in your heart that’s bigger than your finances. It’s bigger than your education, bigger than anything that your family has ever done. And it’s easy to think, “Well, I don’t have the expertise. I don’t have the connections. I don’t have the right people behind me.” It may seem bigger than it really is, but be encouraged today that you have God—you and God are a majority! Your dream is not dependent on other people. Who you are is not dependent on other people. God loves to take ordinary people and use them to do extraordinary things. You have not seen your best days yet. No matter where you are in life, no matter what environment you’re in, no matter how impossible your dreams may seem, no matter what people call you, you need to know God already has a plan. He already has a way to fulfill that plan. If you will stay faithful God will go outside the system and take you places that you never thought possible! He will take you way beyond your dreams to help you live the life of victory He has in store for you!

All the things people said about Nkem and the way they acted towards him did him a great favor. He had no friends which meant his education was all he had to focus on, making him this very intelligent young man. People put labels on him such as obanjie and bastard, But God had a different plan for his life. He beat all the odds and the same people who called him those names are so ashamed they did. He is presently a nurse and has continued to excel. People don’t determine our destiny, God does. But it had to start with us to wanting to fight and remove the stigmas and the labels people may try to stick on us. Learn how to look pass those imperfections knowing that there are many people in the world who wish they could just have a little of what you have. Be in control and use what God has given you without heeding to the negative things you hear about yourself. Who you are makes a big difference.

That means you are not average. You are not ordinary. You are one of a kind, very special and unique. When God created you He went to great lengths to make you exactly the way He wanted. You didn’t just happen to be who you are. You didn’t just accidentally get your nose, your skin color, your gifts or abilities. God designed you the way you are on purpose and for a purpose. We should be encouraged to give praise to Him who created us so beautifully! When you understand your value and that you are a child of God, then your very existence will give God praise. When you are secure in what gifts God gave you, and you go out each day being the best you can, your life will give God praise. Honor God today by accepting who you are. Make the decision to be the best you can be. Get up every morning and set your mind in the right direction by making positive affirmations over your life: “I’m blessed. I’m so specially made. His fingerprints are all over me.” If you will learn to accept and approve who you are and have a good perspective about yourself then you’re going to do great in this life. God is going to pour out His blessings and you will live that life of victory that God has in store!

The only way you can come to feel worthy and really good about yourself, the only way to find a life of meaning and joy, is to find your own voice, find your own path, find your own worth, follow your own heart, and live your own life, not an imitation of somebody else’s or a life directed by what others think or call you.

This is because I have come to understand that first of all we are humans in our own right, thus entitled to our own lives, our own dreams, images, legacies and goals.

I think now, more than ever before, we need people with integrity, character and vision, people who want to lead, who want to encourage, who want to change the world and make it a more peaceful, hopeful and compassionate place. We need a place where more people feel accepted and valued for who they are. We need a world where we can all be ourselves and not an imitation of another.

The Word

Take
Time to be quiet
Hear what your own voice
Is telling you, listen and learn from it.
Learn who you are. Love what you have.

My mom said to me, MC (she always called me that), you have a choice. You can spend the rest of your life trying to measure up, trying to be like others trying to figure out and fulfill other people’s expectations of you, or right now, you can make a decision to let all that go. Everything starts with you, by talking and advising yourself, by talking about what you know, what you feel and what you think. You can start talking about who you are to help others and the time is now.

I’ve learned we’re all worthy of being loved and accepted just for being ourselves.
So here is my question
And you ask it, too
Just who Am I?
Always remember
That who you will be is
Up to you.
Not your father, mother, brother, sister, husband—or me.

Take your time to consider and ponder on this.
Will you be a person
Who gives encouragements?
Or a person who sucks out
All the worth in another?
Will you be a person who puts a smile on another’s face or bring tears and sadness?
To make this crazy world
A far better place
To make some improvements
For our human race.
We must learn how to let people
Be who they want to be, the “who” God created them to be.

I have come into my own, into this new person – and I really love this girl. I’m more of myself than I’ve ever been…

Just who do you want to be?

A Prayer

God of mercy and kindness
Sometimes we forget your promises
And allow ourselves to become scared or jealous.
Thank you for enabling us to be a lead in the cycle of
God’s love, in spreading your word—your truth to the world

Amen!!!

Hope you find it helpful.A lot of you have asked me questions but with fake emails its hard to reply.So please use correct emails and subscribe to my feed in order to get new content every week.God bless you all.

For the other part of the story check at http://www.amazon.com/False-Labels-Inspiration-Encouragement-ebook/dp/B006YSDENC/.The paperback is on sale now for 7.99 for the whole month of May  and  the kindle edition will  be free on the 11 & 12 of May.

 

Share and Enjoy

Seven ways to breaking free from the chains of low self esteem and living the life God created you to live.

# 5 of 7

      Fear of Making Mistakes Or Falling.

ThE OnE wHo FaLls

AnD gEts Up Is So mUcH

sTrOnGeR  tHaN tHe OnE

wHo nEvEr  FeLl

Have ever had a dream but could not pursue it because you were so scared of making a mistake? The society we leave in makes it seems like failure, rejection or making a mistake is the worst possible thing that can happen to any of us. Right?

But I don’t abide with that because no child of God is perfect.

Instead I believe the worst thing that can happen to anyone is when they fail to try just simply because they are afraid of making a mistake. Everyone falls at some point in their lives but what, matters is not that fall but what you do with it. There are two choices; remain down when you fall or get up, wipe the dust or mud from your body and move on. So what will you do? Stay safe in your comfort zone or try, fall, pick up yourself and make safe choices?

There is a short story about women in her fifties who went to audition for a reality show. When it was her turn to sing, everyone in the audience  stood up cheering and clapping almost uncontrollably.she sounded like an angel and sang with such confidence. She wanted to be a singer when she was a little girl but ended up working in a supermarket . When asked why she did not pursue her dreams when she was younger, she said it was because of low self esteem. Check the link below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hoDWyWsxFc&feature=autoplay&list=SPF831382FE2DA1F61&playnext=7

 

 

But after fifty she decided to give her dreams a try because it seemed like all she wanted to do with her life was to be a singer. She had also probably  learned over time that being confident and having a healthy self esteem was more attractive than just being attractive. She was selected and went from being a supermarket worker  to not only being a star but leaving her dreams.

Even though her self esteem held her back for so long, she was able to stand up for it. She probably fell for dream busters , you know those friends and family members  in our  lives  who constantly feed us with negative thoughts  and always remind us about our weaknesses?And who will even   say things like,you can never  among to anything?

http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2664

But the good news is that she finally  came to self realization  that the key to unlocking the chains of fear, insecurities and low self esteem  was to listen to  that still small voice of God which  says she is  worthy instead of  the negative voices of hater and dream busters .

Low self esteem is a dream killer. But having a  high  self esteem or healthy self image  comes from the courage to risk failure and leave the life God created you to leave.It certainly does not happen over night but can be learned and built over time. It  is worth every bit of the efforts.

 

When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and debts are high
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, and ask God the giver of all strength for a little more to take you to the finish line

Don’t be a  quitter and never ever give up. Hold tide.

 

 

http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2898

 

No matter how far or how high your dream is, go for it even if it means falling. Don’t let fear stand on your way. Don’t let it paralyze your dreams.  When you make a mistake, take it as a challenge and an opportunity to make  even more safer choices.

We may fall but rise again if we try and try and try again and again.

 

We will all stand before God at the end of my lives, will you still have some  gifts and talents  left, or you will be able to proudly say , ‘you used everything God  gave you?’.

It’s not too late… the angel said.
Even though the world’s a mess…
Even though you’re not as young…
Even though you’ve made mistakes and have been afraid
It’s not too late…
And then I saw the world through the angels’ eyes…
I saw the colors I could paint
The bridges I could build
The lives that I could touch
The dreams that could still come true
And it became very clear to me…
That it’s not too late.

 

 

Share and Enjoy

Seven ways to breaking free from the chains of low self esteem and living the life God created you to live.

 

A modified excerpt from False Labels Vol.1 Tamika’s Story #6

# 4of 7     Education as one of the greatest self esteem boosters

 

She was a single mom of four children, all from four different fathers. Yes, I know, and we all know it’s wrong both for her and especially for the kids. She also knew that what she did was wrong. She was already ignored by her family and society which was very damaging to her self esteem. People called her useless and a waste, but even so, she was a fighter. She worked at two different stores in order to provide for her family instead of depending on public assistance, as it is the norm here for some girls who find themselves in the same situation as Tamika. Most of the friends she had were into drinking and drugs, and were hanging out on the streets. Her friends also had children and all depended on public assistance for survival. But one day to the surprise of some of her friends, she told them she was going to end the friendship she had with them and go to school. She did not like the life she was living. It was destroying her and the kids God has blessed her with. She felt so worthless and useless that all she was doing was drinking, doing drugs and hanging on street corners, instead of being a role model for her kids.

These friends laughed and made fun of her because they could not imagine her going to school when she could barely feed her kids. Despite having four kids with four different men, she had been raped several times in her early years. These rapes were kept secret because of fear. No one in her family was ever able to finish high school or get their GED’s. She was determined to break that chain and get an education.

 

Education is a golden and everlasting treasure. When you have it, no one can ever take it away

From you

http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2703

Every dream starts with a great dreamer and Tamika had a dream. She told her friends and family that she wants to become a judge. This idea brought more laughter from everyone because they did not believe she could possibly accomplish such a task.

To begin her dream, she started by finding information on how to get her general educational development (GED) . First, Tamika worked with some great people who directed her to a college called Lehman College where she could be tutored for free. Next, she registered for the classes to start the next semester. With four little children it was going to be tough. There was a daycare close to the school that could watch two of her children.

School days  were busy. Tamika got up very early in the morning to get everyone ready for the day. She had to take two of the children to their school using the public bus system, then return home to get the other two ready and take them with her to the a daycare that was by the school. She then attended her classes. This routine continued for a whole year until she finally got her GED. She was so motivated after getting her diploma that she wanted to continue with her education. She applied to Lehman College and again was accepted. She also qualified for financial aid which was a blessing and a big help. With the same routine, she continued her college education for years and graduated with a degree in social science. After getting her college degree, she then continued on to eventually become a lawyer, making her the first in her family to ever attain that level of education. Tamika achieved something no one in her family had ever done. She removed a label that had been stuck on her family from one generation to another and started an amazing legacy. She instilled hope into the lives of many girls around her, girls who thought the only answer to life was the drugs, the alcohol, and prostitution.

All her four kids had opportunities to get education and have better lives because of their mother. The first son became a lawyer and opened a law office with his mother. The second  son, became a medical doctor, the third a nurse practitioner and the very last baby is still in college. Thanks to a mother who had the strength to ignore those around her who put her down and laughed at her dreams. Her self esteem was restored and now she helps young women in her community on how to use education as a means to build their self esteem.

Education is a human right with immense power of transformation

 

Do not only think of education as only a way to get a career to change your social and economic status but rather think of it in addition as a journey to discovering yourself, to discovering your own humility, what your contribution is to your community and to the world and also use it to expose yourself to the world. Do not belittle whatever contribution you have for your community or the world. Ishmael Beah

In life, people will push you to the side

As a write -off may be because of some things

From your past. But what do you do? Be discouraged

And give-up on yourself and your dreams and be consumed

With low self esteem? Be a quitter? Or stand firm, stand up tall

And ask the supplier of all strength and courage for just a bit more

To continue to the finish line?

 Thankz for stopping by and for all the kind words and the feedback.Please subscribe to the feed in order to get new content every week.Also use valid emails because with all the fake emails ,its difficult to answer some of your questions.I really do appreciate you all .

# 5 of 7 next week

Share and Enjoy

Seven ways to breaking free from the chains of low self esteem and living the life God created you to live.

 

 

# 3 of 7.                            What is  your calling in life ?

 

 

Mr. Jones graduated from post graduate school  with a  masters  degree in nursing. A degree that  earned him a good  job. A job that pays all his bills and takes care of his family. A job with a very excellent benefit package  with health insurance and  paid vacation. A job that bought his dream home[a mansion, of course] but there is a constant void in his heart. He is never  happy or  feels fulfilled despite all of his accomplishments.  He is always  stressed  out  .Meanwhile his  neighbor Ms Jeans  who is  a teacher   in a local  public school is having a blast  even though she  earns  a very meager salary .She is  very happy  with her life and also feels fulfilled. She also finds  time to  knit blankets and donate to a local charity and also participate in  a local soup kitchen  which makes  soup twice a week and  feeds the  homeless  in her community.

And  Mr. Jones  starts wandering what is going on here? He  has more of everything than she does but yet  is never  happy .

Picturing Mr. Jones from a far, you will see someone who is living an American dream. He has a masters degree in nursing which is a very big accomplishment. Besides he has a good job,a beautiful  family ,a big car and a mansion. But he clearly does not seem to have neither the passion for his job nor feels fulfilled for all his accomplishments. While Ms Jeans on the other hand even with a small salary in having a blast. She does what she is passionate about and thus feels fulfilled.

Mr. Jones stands as one in a thousand, if not millions of us who get into some jobs just to get by but finds no fulfillment at the end. And by so doing we end up not knowing exactly who we are or what our life’s purpose is. Then we continue to live with low self esteem and no confidence.

 

So the big question here is: what is your life’s purpose?

 

Here are a few things you can do to find what your true calling is.

1] Get over your fears

Low self esteem causes  fear. That kind of fear that will not allow you to do anything. That fear that has a still small but ugly voice constantly feeding you with negative thoughts. That voice that tells you , look, you are not good enough and can never do anything right. And because you are in this vulnerable place of low-self esteem, you start believing and giving in. But if you will just turn things around and listen instead to God’s own voice and what he has in store for you, you will get over all your fears. All you need to live a purpose driven life is already in you. Thus you have to get rid of those negative thoughts which instills fear into you .Then you will be on a journey to finding and fulfilling your true calling.

2] Stop procrastinating.

Don’t wait for clarity–right time or the  big moment because it may never come. Most people have the habit of waiting for the right time ,the time when they finish college, the time when they get married, or if I can just have this one more degree, or when I get a little older and so on. And as you spend time whining, time swiftly passes by and before you know it, you are old and weak and can’t do anything. Soon you start wishing you would have done those things God put in you when he created you.Oh, I had such great talents and gifts you murmur to yourself. Then you regret , lament and die leaving your job undone.

 

3]Time waits for nobody.

If you are in a job and realized that despite the amount of money you are earning you still don’t find any passion or  fulfillment, there is no need  to keep that job. Look for what you are passionate about because that’s where you will get fulfillment.When you are doing a job that is your true calling,there is happiness and the constant zeal to do more and more.You never get fed up. Continuing to work in a job you don’t like is not only torturing yourself but is wasting your time. You end  up just existing and not living the life you were created to live. You waste all your talents and gifts.But the choice is yours,whether  you want just the money to get by or the money and the fulfillment?

4]Help others succeed .

When you help others win at life, your life will become better.when you water others, you are in turn watering yourself.

The great news is that YOU matter, you matter to yourself, to those around you, and to God. How do you plan to make your life count? Do you want to continue drifting through life, without a purpose?

Helping others does not necessarily mean giving a box of money. It only means having the heart to do it.

If you have been given the spiritual gift of encouragement, then be encouraging to the people in your life. There are people around you who are down and just need a kind word from someone to get them going. Reach out to them. If you have the gift of hospitality, think of ways to open up your home to help someone in need to deepen relationships. Maybe there is a really painful experience in your life that God helped you through that can give you a special insight to help others with a similar problem.

All of us have something that can help change another person’s life in one way or the other. God is not asking you to stand on street corners and shout “Jesus Loves You” to those walking by, but he does ask us to be ready to give an account of the hope and love we do have for His children.

Spend today thinking of a few steps you could take to start delivering the Good News to those in your world. Think of those times you have had deep problems and God helped you through someone else. You can do the same for others. You can be a smile giver, the giver of God’s love, hope  and help.

Be a messenger today for God! Be a useful vessel!

5] Never give up

The first step in everything you do is to believe in yourself first. There should not be a need for plan B because plan A did not work. If you set your mind on something, set realistic goals and are determined, you will never think about giving up on your dreams.

It’s also ok to ask for what you want as you go on this journey to finding what your purpose is. Don’t be ashamed, don’t be intimidated, just ask. There are good people out there who are ready and willing to answer questions from those who ask.

But also remember to take it Step-by step and brick by brick. You cannot set up to build a wall in a day. You lay the bricks down one by one carefully and nicely.

 

 

The purpose of life is to live life with a purpose

Richard leider.

Here with some questions for you to ponder on your own. You can write your answers in your journal or wherever you choose.

What has meaning for you?

And what is your drive?

What are you passionate about?

What are your unique personal qualities?

And how do you life expressing those qualities?

When are you the most happy?

Do you know your unique talents and gifts?

The true answers lie deep within us. We just have to search deep in our hearts to find it.

Each of us in our own way is destined to make  a  differences in this world. Do not ever under estimate what your contribution is.

Find your life’s purpose and start living the life God created you to live.

 

In order to find your

Calling in life, you have to learn

How to be true to your own self and stop

Trying to be what other people want you to be. Don’t just be.There, make a difference. Be something, represent something.

When you are living your life on a purpose, you will find greater fulfillment and joy in all that you do—Jack canfield.

Thanks a billion for all your comments.I do appreciate them all.You are all encouraged to subscribe to my feed in order to get new content every week. 

 

Share and Enjoy

Seven ways to breaking free from the chains of low self esteem and living the life God created you to live.

2 of 7 )                           Learning to Love Yourself

Do you wake up hating yourself?

Do you dread some days so much that you don’t want to get out of your bed?
Do you feel discouraged with  life and everything that goes on around you?
Do you want greater self-esteem, productivity, and joy in daily living?

We get so depressed and angry when people call us names or sabotage us or try to stick false labels on us. But what if you are the one sabotaging yourself? What if you are the one calling yourself names such as:

See what Eliza is doing to herself here, sabotaging her own very self.

I am too short

I am too fat

I am too little

I am too tall

I am not worth anything

I wish I was like John or Mary

I don’t like my nose

I cannot do anything good.

I am so unworthy I can’t do that.

The one thing I know for sure is that there are no two versions of any human being, meaning there is only one you and you alone on the face of the earth. You don’t have to try to be someone else but your own very self. You have to accept and appreciate who you are and how you were created.

 

If you hate yourself that much, who will like you?

Let God Approve You Not People

So many people gain their sense of worth based on what others think of them.

Do they like me?

Do they approve of me?

Do they think I’m important?

Many people become something they are not because they think by conforming to the expectations of others they will get somewhere in life. It is very liberating when you realize that you don’t need approval of others to be who you are or get where you want to be in life and fulfill your God-given destiny. All you need is approval from God. All you need is to have faith in yourself and God and believe in who He created you to be. It’s time to live feeling secure, being the person God made you to be, not what someone else wants you to be. When you are secured in who God created you to be and confident enough in the destiny in front of you, then it doesn’t matter what others say or do. Make pleasing and living for the Lord  your number one priority. Not only will you live life in more freedom and happiness, but you will become everything God created you to be.

Instead of negative self-talk, change your thoughts and say good things about yourself. Use words and phrases that will help encourage you and build you up instead of putting you down. I truly believe in affirmations because they encourage and empower us. It’s more like having your own cheering squad in word form. They have been used by great people to achieve tremendous goals. They are statements you want to believe in and hold on to. Words to say to yourself every time you get those negative self talks or thoughts or when someone tries put you down.

Remove the old labels and start re-labeling yourself with what God says about you.

You could make up your own affirmations by saying things like:

I am uniquely and specially made

I am worthy

I am lovable

I am beautiful

I am successful

I can achieve any dream I set my mind on

I am the child of the most High God.

In declaring God’s blessings upon your life, you are killing the devil and putting him under your feet.

“I may wish I had different calves and thighs and no knock knees. But I like who I am as a person. And because I believe there is much more to me than my looks other people believe it too” Felicia P Fields.

“The body you are born with sculpts your personality as intricately and definingly as any life experience. For nearly eighteen years, my six-feet-seven-inches-ness made me shy, exclusive, and vigilantly self-conscious… Twenty-five years later, I love being tall. What could be cooler? It’s my pleasure to grab soup or cashews on high shelves for mothers in supermarkets. I like the fact that my kids won’t ever lose me in a crowd.” Peter Smith, writer.

“The best we can do is focus on what we have the power to improve in ourselves and when it comes to body- love the one you’re with.” Sara Davidson, writer.

StOp SeaRcHiNg ThE wOrLd FoR tReAsUrE.

bEcaUsE tHe rEaL tReAsUrE iS YoU.

 

                                            A Gold Mine

http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=1803

You can search throughout the entire

universe for someone who is more deserving

of your love and affection than you are yourself,

and that person is not to be found anywhere ,not even in gold mines. You yourself,

as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.

 

 

Feeling good feels wonderful. You owe it to yourself to feel good!

 

 

 Thanks a billion for all your comments.I do appreciate them all.You are all encouraged to subscribe to my feed in order to get new content every week.

# 3 OF 7 next week.

Share and Enjoy

What Is Holding You Back Part 2

 

There is something that allows you to face your challenges with boldness, honesty and courage. It enables you to live without fears or worries and to live a real life. You don’t have to pretend you’re somebody else . You can walk with your shoulders raised and your head up. When you have this ‘thing’, it gives you the permission to be unique and different just the way God created you. When you have it, you feel so healthy both in and out. Yourself image becomes superb. You tend to be very proud and comfortable with yourself. You know what your strengths are and also understand that you are very specially made. You are confident, happy, highly motivated and have the right attitude to succeed in life.

Can you guess what this ‘thing’ is?

Take a good look at Mr.Jones in the picture below

He is so Confident

He has a sense of self-direction

He has no time for the blaming game but takes full responsibility of own errors

He has an awareness of personal strengths

He has an ability to make mistakes and learn from them

Accept criticism from others

He is  optimistic

He has a very good ability to solve problems

He has an independent and cooperative attitude

He feels comfortable with life

He trust others

He has a  good sense of personal limitations

He is   very neat and takes good care of himself

He doesn’t have a problem saying NO

 

http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2125

On the other hand, when you don’t have this’ thing’, it’s very easy to spot you in a crowd. You tend to be a complainer, and blame everyone around you. You compare yourself to others and are never satisfied with yourself. Then you begin to slowly turn into a negative person, putting others down, and worst of all a jerk and a bully.  This ‘thing’ comes from a poor self image. You begin to doubt yourself. Am I good enough, reliable, hardworking, honest or a friendly person, do I have what it takes? Do I like what I see when I look in the mirror and do I believe when people tell me I look pretty? This ‘thing’ feeds your negative thinking and causes you to believe the criticism others make of you.  This ‘thing’ is a debilitating condition that keeps you from achieving your dreams and realizing your full potential in life. Anyone with  this ‘thing’ feels unworthy, incapable, incompetent,  insecure, never sure of themselves, always ungrateful, always sad and depressed.

Are able to guess now what this ‘thing’ is?

Take a good look at  Miss Daniella

 

 She is afraid  of standing up for herself

Can’t  speak up for herself.

She is always in the back of the room .

Never confident.

She has  a very negative view of life.

She is so scared and paranoid of others – even those who show signs of love.

She plays the blaming game all the time and can’t take responsibility of own self.

She has a fear of taking risks.

She has a fear of being a failure.

Dependence – letting others make decisions for her.

Fear of being ridiculed.

she has her head bent down in shame or guilt.

http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2998

she is shabby and does not take good care of herself

 

 

What is this ‘Thing’ Anyway?

The name is SELF-ESTEEM.

 

And what is self esteem?

Self esteem  can be defined as ones opinion of his or her self worth. It is how we value ourselves; how we perceive our value to the world and to others. It affects nearly every part of our lives such as our trust in others, our actions, our thoughts, our relationships, our jobs. While positive self-esteem gives us the strength and flexibility to take charge of our lives and grow from our mistakes without the fear of rejection, low self-esteem does the direct opposite. It sucks out every bit of self worth you ever had.

 

A very healthy self esteem is more like an armor against all the giants of the world. People who feel good about themselves are most likely to handle criticism and conflict well instead of falling for negative pressure. They are more optimistic and realistic. They have a good perception of who they are. They are motivated.

 

I mean that the only way you can come to feel worthy, and really good about yourself – the only way to find a life of meaning and joy – is to find your own voice, find your own path, follow your own heart and live your own life, not an imitation of somebody else’s. Maria Shriver

 

 

 

But how can we break free from the strongholds that have kept us back for so long?

How can we move from this place of low self esteem to a place of high esteem?

How can we break free from negative self-concepts and self-defeating behaviors?

How can we handle our mistakes and response well to criticism?

How can we foster compassion for ourselves and others?

How can we set up and achieve goals that will enrich our lives and those around us?

How can we find and keep the courage to love ourselves?

What is that ticket to a life of continuous personal growth, happiness and fulfillment?

How can we get rid of anger, guilt, or sadness with ourselves ?

How can we use our mind, imagination, emotions, body and intuition, to create the life we desire?

 

 

Seven ways to breaking free from the chains of low self esteem and living the life God created you to leave.

1 of 7 )Trust In God

The very first thing I will like to share with you is to trust in God. Is to learn how to surrender all your burdens to Him.  Is never to be afraid to take that big step of faith. Is to know that He is a specialist in the impossibilities.

I will share my personal experience here.

There was a time in my life when I lost everything I ever had of myself worth based on some lows I had in my teen years. I never knew anything as self esteem. During this dark period of my life,  I was fighting a battle with myself.

Unfortunately most the people around me were not so merciful. I was called all sort of names and was treated very poorly.  Along the way, I realized that even though my family was so strong behind me with their love and support, the bad names were just ironed in my heart.  This went on for so many years but it got to a point where I was so tired of living in pain and in darkness.

 

I finally got to a place in my life where I knew that if I can just surrender my loads to God, He can undo what ever torture I have been through.

In 2005,I started writing in my journal which later became a book I wanted to publish in order to help others .When I sent query letters to publishers in down town New York, I got uncountable rejection letters . But surprisingly enough, it did not add even a bit to my low self esteem. This was because  at this time I had learned how to surrender and trust in God with every step I make.It instead gave me the fuel to push on. Every year from 2005,I kept trying, knowing so well that just one day He will do it for me. Meanwhile I had continued to research the publishing world. During my research, I heard about self-publishing and turn my research towards that end.

Early this year, on January the 17^th my eBook/kindle was released which was one of the most exciting moments of my life. It started getting some attention. But most people wanted the paperback .So on February the 6^th the print version was out. In just two weeks of release, it was on the Amazon top 100 best selling list in two categories. During the launch week , (the third week of release)   both editions  got to the top again in three categories.

The most fascinating thing happened just last week  when  the kindle edition  hit #1 in two categories – self esteem and meditation and # 41 in kindle store out of a million books in Amazon’s kindle store. In the three days that we put the book on KDP select free promotion, we got 8,661 downloads.

Product Details

File Size: 1378 KB

• Sold by: Amazon Digital Services
• Language: English
• ASIN: B006YSDENC
• Text-to-Speech: Enabled
• Lending: Enabled
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #41 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Free in Kindle Store)

#1 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Nonfiction > Religion & Spirituality > New Age > Meditation

#1 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Nonfiction > Advice & How-to > Health, Mind & Body > Self-Help > Self-Esteem

 

 

 

The main reason I was rejected by all the publishers I had sent query letters to was because I did not have a platform. I was no celebrity and had no audience. Prior to the release of this book, I had only 83 friends on facebook with a few friends from school, my church family and my family members. That was my platform. But I had prayed this prayer  prior to publishing the book..

”Lord, just as you blessed Abraham with a descendant like the dust of the earth, please bless me with an audience more than I can count. Bless me with people that will read my story and be inspire by it’

On Sunday the 18^th of March, I had my first book signing at my church and have never been so overwhelmed. The church was packed. And when it got to the time for the book signing which was supposed to been after service, people were not only buying single copies but  were taking two’s, or three’s  or four copies of the book. I remember a lady that asked for six  copies at a time.

This is nothing other than God’s hand at work. This is God’s favor in the most amazing way. He has also blessed me with family members and friends who have been going out of their way to recommend the book to others. If I stand tall today, If I stand with my face up instead of  bent down in shame and low self esteem, it is because of what the Lord had done for me.

But it all started when I decided to start surrendering all my burdens to Him. He has truly been there through every step I have made.

He can do the same for you if only you believe and trust in Him. But Hey! It’s a choice whether to continue to leave in darkness and low self esteem or get out and enjoy what God has in store for you.

 

 

 

GOd  hAs  A pErfEct TiMiNg;

NeVeR eArLy,NeVeR lAtE

iT tAkEs A little PaTiEnCe

aNd It TaKeS

a lOt OF faith.

bUt It’S wOrTh ThE WaIt

 

Stop hiding underneath that low self esteem. Put your trust in Him and you will never regrets you did.

 

Thank you so much for visiting this blog.I do see and appreciate all the comments and will response to all.

Please subscribe to my feed in order to get new post every week.

Watch for # 2 of 7

 

 

 

Share and Enjoy

An Update of False Labels launch week and promotion

 I just want to update you on  the launch week and promotion for  False Labels . Its been wonderful,thanks  to the support of good people like you out there that the book  has been a great success  just within two months of release.I thank you all for your endless support.Below you will find some excellent results from Amazon.

Product Details

• File Size: 1378 KB
• Sold by: Amazon Digital Services
• Language: English
• ASIN: B006YSDENC
• Text-to-Speech: Enabled
• Lending: Enabled
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,838 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Free in Kindle Store)
  • #1 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Nonfiction > Advice & How-to > Health, Mind & Body > Self-Help > Self-Esteem
  • #3 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Nonfiction > Religion & Spirituality > New Age > Meditation

Share and Enjoy

What is Holding You back Part I

 

 

Do you feel weak or inadequate? Are you letting a weakness, failure or shortcoming keep you from letting God do great things in your life? Do you constantly look at your friend or brother or sister and wish your eyes or nose was like theirs? Or sometimes you are just so scared to say how you feel because you think you will sound so dumb? Or you hate your legs  or your hands so much?

Well, what I have come to know for sure is that whether we fixate on our bodies, minds, personalities, or actions, every human being struggles with feelings of not being good enough. Each day we face a barrage of images and ideas–from the media and society–telling us who we should be. We are led to believe that if we could just change those flaws by looking perfect and leading a perfect life, then we’d no longer feel inadequate.

In this article we will realize that it is actually our imperfections that connect us to one another as human beings and make us who we are. It is the imperfection of the human race that makes the world very unique place to be. We are naturally drawn to those we view as authentic, real, and down-to-earth. It makes sense, then, that we should learn how to love and celebrate our own lives instead of imitating others. And also fully owning every aspect of ourselves.If we can find some greatness and dignity in our flaws and evolving our self-perceptions we will learn how to accept our humanness with compassion and practice empathy with ourselves and others.

So if you are one of those who never felt like they are good enough, who constantly want to be like John or Mary, then it’s time to shake  it off. We all have weaknesses and shortcomings. You are not alone. There is no child of God who is perfect.

 

Corinthians 12:9 says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

 

Every one of us has some unique flaws. In fact, the men and women that served God in the Bible doing extraordinary things were ordinary men and women  like you and me,with flaws, imperfections and weaknesses. But the key is they still were willing to serve God. They didn’t let their limitations hold them back from serving . And neither should you.

God wants to use you right now wherever you are and the way you  are to do great things. If God chose us just based on our looks, race, heights, background, our past performances, even our talents or abilities, none of us may have a chance in life.

But God doesn’t choose us because of what we are, He chooses us because of what we can become.

When you serve Him by helping others even with your imperfections, you grow within your own self, developing a good self image. Don’t sit on the sidelines of life anymore. God did not handpick you because you were perfect, or because you had it all together. He chose you because He saw the potential in you. He knows what you can become; you’ve got to get back in the race. Get your fire back. Get your dreams back.Get your happiness back. Don’t sit back and wait  until you’re perfect because it’s going to be a very long wait for something that will never happen.  He wants to bless you in spite of your weaknesses.

 

 

Human beings are made in all shapes, colors, forms. That is why we have the too short, the too tall or the too fat. But you should not let those things decide how or when you serve God. Learn how to like who He created you to be and use your imperfections to help both yourself ,your community and the world.

On the other hand just imagine a world filled with only tall  people or only short people, or you get out of your house one day and only find people on wheel chairs starring at you.Scary enough right?So God knew what He was doing when He was creating the world and also the kind of people to dwell in it.But the most beautiful news is that everyone counts and  is so special  and unique in their own right.Own who you are and celebrate it everyday.Make peace your yourself and all that you are and go out everyday with your head high knowing that you are a very special human being.

 

But how can we break free from the stronghold that is keeping us back?

Check out Part 2 Next week.

Part two of this article will attempt some solutions on how we can all, embrace our imperfections joyfully, wholeheartedly and with pride.

Hope you enjoy the read.

Please kindly subscribe to the email list .Also invite friends to stop by this blog every week for fresh content. Your comments and feedback will be greatly appreciated.

 

Share and Enjoy

What is in your Hands Part 2

In part one of what is in your hands, we talked about the many gifts and talents that God has blessed us with. We also talked about the fact that lots of people will go into their graves without ever making any use of these many gifts and talents they have been given.

When God asked Moses in the Exodus story to go down to Egypt and get His people out of bondage, he tried to make some excuses like: I am not a good speaker. I am not the right person for a job like this. Most of us are not very different from Moses. We have been given so many gifts and talents but we waste around and let them go by because we think we don’t have what it takes or we are not good enough.

Before you read any further, look at your hands. What do you see? What is in your hands? I have asked this question so many times to many people and these are some of the responses:

I see my hands or I see nothing or I see my fingers or I see some lines in my palms. These are all perfect answers because it means that at least you have a hand.

But what if you did not have a hand? What will you do? In this post we are going to meet some extraordinary people. Some were born without hands, some without limbs and some without both hands and limbs. You may also be asking, what is extraordinary about someone who has no limbs? Check this out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XW1akk-5mT0&feature=related

http://paulinevictoria.com

Pauline was born with no arms nor legs. She would have sat on the side lines of life and felt wasted. But she recognizes the fact that God created her the way she was for a reason. She is an inspirational speaker which means she is using what God blessed her with to bless and inspire others.

After listening to her, do you still want to ask what is extraordinary about her?

Our next extraordinary woman was electrocuted at two years old and lost both hands as a result but never let that put her down or stop her from living a normal life.

She is a wife, a mother an aerobics instructor, and an inspiration to millions.

Watch this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKA_hNszdn0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=I_tS4gmgnAs

The third extraordinary person I want to share his story with you is a young gentle man who was born without arms and limbs. Despite all he went through and many attempts to take his life because of all the pain and struggles of living without arms and limbs , he finally got the reason  why he is on earth and has been an inspiration to millions of people throughout the world.

The reason for this post is to encourage, inspire and empower everyone to recognize the blessings they have around them and use it to in turn inspire others. Your contribution to your community, country or the world is never too small. Change just one soul and you change the world.

Watch this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=r0daM97RT0k

God can use you right where you are, exactly the way you are. Don’t limit yourself or let anyone limit you. Don’t let people label you because you are worthy and matter to God, to yourself, your community and the world. Using what is in your hands to impact others does not mean you should have a bag full of money or ‘the good life’. Without arms and limbs, you will think that these people will feel sad, give up and just sit back, but as you have seen, they have no limits. And don’t they inspire you and make you with hands; limbs and legs feel like you are wasting?

Go ahead and use even those very painful moments in your life in which God saved you from to inspire other people.

There is someone out there that needs to hear your story.

There is someone out there that needs your help.

There is someone out there that needs to hear your voice and be lifted up.

Just reach out and use what you have in your hands. Lay it down just as Moses laid the rod down and it later became the rod that was used to perform all the miracles in Egypt.

 

 

What do you have that you have been given?

Talent

Education

Freedom

Influence

Wealth

Networks

Food

Shelter

Ideas

Creativity

Opportunities

What are you doing with what you have been given?

 

 

 

‘The World Awaits That Gift Which Only You Has Come To Deliver’.

 

 

Thanks a billion for stopping by this blog. Be kind to leave a comment and also enter your email to subscribe for more inspirational stories every week. Your feedback will be greatly appreciated.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Share and Enjoy

Have you ever felt like a fake, or felt like you are just drifting through life instead of living?

A lot of people feel this way at some point in their lives. But more often than not even though we feel that way, we still settle into living our  normal daily routines of waking up in the morning, eating, going to work (in jobs we sometimes don’t like), coming back home, eating, taking a shower and going to sleep to get ready for the next day. Then sometime we go to parties during the weekend and be ready to start the circle over again. But then even though you are working seven days a week and making a big pay check, you still feel a big void, some sort of emptiness which you cannot explain. Then you realize you are not going anywhere. Bills just keep piling up. Yet an entire week has gone by, maybe a month, and you are still faced with a big hole in your mind.  You are faced with a challenge that has logged into your world for a couple of weeks, months or even years. It could be that this problem keeps recurring in your life and you are short of options to find the actual solutions.   Worst of all, you can’t focus on anything else. You are probably hopeless feeling emotionally, psychologically and physically tortured.

While you are going in circles with this routine, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years go by and, because time waits for no one, you get old and die.

I have been in this situation before and felt so washed out. I was literally breaking down. But one evening in November 2005, a certain journalist hosted a show for women who have gone through all kinds of lows and adversities which caused them to lose their identities and self worth and for lots of women who had complaint of this emptiness in their lives.

The journalist’s closing remarks and advice to these ladies and hundreds of others with problems, was that:  first ask yourself, “Why was I created and why am I here, what is my purpose, why did God create me? What am I here for?

This was a huge wake up call for me. It reminded me of the words I heard many years ago at my dad’s sermon in which he had given each member of the church some cards on which was printed, “Who you are makes a difference, so make your life count.” This journalist’s advice to the women and my dad’s words echoed in my mind. I laid there on the couch and kept repeating those words. If I were gone today, who would say I made an impact in their lives? Was I really making my life count, if all I had known  was just existing? What legacy was I going to leave while I am gone? It was a very scary moment because then I started to realize what a waste my life had been. That also reminded me of a sermon I heard from my pastor in which he said that our time on earth is like that little dash we see in cemeteries, from the date of birth to the date of death. And I also remembered these words…

I am only one
But still I am one
I cannot do everything
But still I can do something
And because I cannot do everything
I will not refuse to do that which I can do…

Heller Keller

The truth is that you and I each have only one life to live here on earth. And that little time we have is fleeting. It’s running and does not wait for anyone.

 

As I laid there and continued to ask myself these questions and continued to reflect on my life, I thought about what really mattered in life and would I have made a difference when I am gone. I realized that nothing mattered unless I decided to start making my life meaningful instead of just drifting through life without purpose and without caring. What will I do with my life? Will I consume it? Cruise through it or use it in a way that will glorify God? The questions were just endless and from then on I was willing to let God use my one and only life to make it useful for Him.

The great news is that YOU matter, you matter to yourself, to those around you, and to God. How do you plan to make your life count? Do you want to continue drifting through life,  or use what God has blessed you with?

But how?

I grew up watching   the movie The Ten Commandments and enjoyed reading the Exodus Story.

Exodus chapter 3 ff

I am especially fascinated with the part when God appeared to Moses in the burning bush  and asked him to go down to Egypt and help get his chosen people, the Israelite out of bondage. Like every human being, Moses showed some reluctance and made some excuses because he thought he did not have what it took to lead the people out. Exodus 3 -11, but I am not the person for a job like this Moses said. Chapter 3 –10 he said he was not a good speaker. But when God asked Him “What is in your hands? And Moses answered a shepherd’s rod. God had asked him again to put it down. When he did, the rod turned into a serpent. When Moses picked it up, it became a rod again

This rod was a symbol or represented what God had put in Moses’s hand.

 

Moses was a Shepherd boy so the rod represented his identity, status, his income, his background and a lot more.

 

And the entire miracle that later happened in Egypt was done using that rod.

I am no preacher, nor a professor but just a human being who believes for sure that when God created us, He blessed each and everyone with something. He put something in our hands just as He did Moses. But most of the times we make all sorts of excuses just like what Moses did.

Oh,I don’t have what is takes

I don’t have money

I don’t have the skills

I don’t and more I don’t have.

So the most difficult question is, What Is In Your Hands?

I believe that those very special gifts, skills, abilities and talents is what God had placed in your hands.

Most people have the opportunities of knowing their purpose  or what they have in their hands when they are young, but ignore or do not recognize these opportunities because life is so sweet or bitter that it deters their minds. But you see a whole 60-70% of us will go to our graves without knowing who we are, why we were created in the first place and worst of all why God gave us all these great gifts, talents and opportunities

 

                                Will It help to remember that you are not alone?

As long as you breathe, you are connected to God, who dwells within you.  Surrender your problem to that mighty power that is locked within your very soul, and lays waiting for you to put your trust in it.  Besides, who knows? If what is happening wasn’t happening, do you have any idea about what would be happening? Therefore, let go, and let God take over. Besides doesn’t it make more sense to give your problem to the expert? It is vital to acknowledge the fact that you can’t do everything on your own. God wants us to lay down just as he asked Moses what is in our hands and use it for His glory.

Like anything in life, I believe the antidote for that void, that emptiness we feel inside, is recognizing the purpose for which we were created. It is to recognize what we have been given.

Again, what is in your hands?

Education

Skills,

Ideas

Wealth

Networks

Freedom

Influence

Creativity

Talents

Shelter

Food

If we all lay  these gifts down God will show us how to use them, we will not only live a fulfilled life  but will fulfill the purpose for which God created us and in turn make our communities, countries and the world a better place.

“The World awaits that gift which only you has come to deliver”

   Be sure to stop by on Sunday for part 2

Share and Enjoy